Browsing All Posts filed under »random«

Biggest snake in the world – 55-ft long

June 8, 2012

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Photograph purporting to show a 55ft snake found in a forest in Malaysia has become an internet sensation. Biggest snake in the world. The thread claimed the snake was one of two enormous boas found by workers clearing forest for a new road. They apparently woke up the sleeping snakes during attempts to bulldoze a […]

Reply to: I Don’t Have the Strength … To Be a Nigerian by Sugabelly

April 8, 2012

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After reading this Sugarbelly’s post I don’t have strength to be a Nigerian, the first thing I remembered were her very “I don’t know the words to use here” comments in my post titled: David seduced bathsheeba, why did bathsheeba bath in the open.  I had tried to mediate the foul use of words(comments) before […]

10-days ago, MyPenMyPaper clocked five

January 29, 2012

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Last year, I remembered this blog’s birthday two days after. This year its exactly 10days after. Oh my. Am I loosing my memory, or the fact that blogging has become my second nature just makes me to hit the “publish” button everytime without remembering where I am publishing to. above birthday photo for 2012 is […]

Between Madam Patience Goodluck Jonathan and First Lady Patricia Obahiagbon Goodluck Jonathan

April 29, 2011

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Its no news that the Nigerian First lady is not an enviable icon of hope in the public speaking department. It was one of my colleagues at work who drew my attention to the comedy/grammatical atrocities committed by our very own first lady – so today, I decided to check it out myself. Its so […]

interesting conversation: a telemarketer calls Mr. Okoro

October 26, 2009

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From Facebook   Enjoy this dialogue between a Nigerian man and an American telemarketer. Ring…..Ring. ..Ring Mr Okoro : Hello? Telemarketer: Hi, this is Raheema calling from Hollywood Hereafter Resources. I just wanted to let you know that your phone number was randomly selected in a drawing and we have reserved a free burial space […]

interesting conversation: a telemarketer calls Mr. Okoro

October 26, 2009

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From Facebook   Enjoy this dialogue between a Nigerian man and an American telemarketer. Ring…..Ring. ..Ring Mr Okoro : Hello? Telemarketer: Hi, this is Raheema calling from Hollywood Hereafter Resources. I just wanted to let you know that your phone number was randomly selected in a drawing and we have reserved a free burial space […]

If I were governor of Lagos state – of Lagos and its Liberian beggars

October 20, 2009

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If it was somebody that looked like Mama Lara, the usual agbero, the FFBs, Mallams from Maiduguri, or children running after everyone passing on the street – with their hands stretched out, asking for 20–Naira, I would have been less surprised. When someone walks up to you in Oshodi, says ‘please help me, I need money, I’m […]

question: how was your night

September 16, 2009

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While Oyinbo’s (in Yankee) would greet ‘good morning, how are you’, for which a ‘I’m fine, thank you’ would suffice, and be plainly professional, ‘how was your night’ is the most ideal Nigerian greeting I’ve heard in years. When you see someone first time in the day, or you bump into each other in a bus, colleagues arriving at work in the […]

re – Man In Coma After Police Torture

August 24, 2009

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I have always maintained that the two greatest problems Nigeria has, in terms of security are the Nigerian Police and armed robbers. In terms of who is worse, the Nigerian Police come first. the story below can be concluded as follows: two men walked into a police station to make a statement over their disagreement. […]

Wedding Invitation – Queen WEDS Smart

August 18, 2009

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WEDDING! WEDDING!! WEDDING!!! Dear all You are all invited for the holy matrimony of our dear friend and colleague now at the branch, kindly contact me for the Aso-Ebi. Ladies Aso-Ebi: N5,500.00 Guys:                N1,000.00 Date:               29th.August, 2009 Venue:             Obudu Cattle Ranch, Calabar Dress Code:      Black suit, white shirt & bow tie Meet the Couples……………   […]

Question: what is the difference between Loving to Hate and Hating to Love

August 13, 2009

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I have a question, the answer of which I know would vary. Here: what is the difference between loving to hate and hating to love. Do these two statements have the same meaning?: 1) I Love to Hate you, 2) I Hate to Love you Question: if your answer is “Yes, the statements mean the […]

Midnight radio discussion: sex is like

August 1, 2009

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I noted these down last tuesday night, 2pm. I woke up to ease myself, found it hard fall back to sleep and decided to turn on the radio: —————— 1) Sex is like my three mamaputs. The first specializes in Amala and ewdeu soup. The second is all out for Yam and beans, and the […]

DIASPORA WAHALA – someone please help us

April 21, 2009

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DIASPORA is one word that pisses me off. My piss-off about this word is generally with the way its used, interpreted / applied, and generally flung around everywhere anyone wants to talk / write about and refer to Nigeria from an external perspective (example: we Nigerians in the DIASPORA); or internally, refer to Nigerians living […]

how to develop Nigeria in 5-years

April 18, 2009

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Let us assume for 1-minute that America and Nigeria can exchange places, I mean physically. Let us assume that plane-loads of people could fly across the two countries, transporting all Nigerians to the land of the free – yankee(greener pastures) and transporting all Americans(bonafide and immigrant) back to mother-land Africa. Let us also assume that […]

NEPA Institute of Time Prediction studies (NITPS)

April 16, 2009

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Anybody who says there is democracy in Nigeria is a liar, we are still in a Military regime. The reason I say this is because our physical environment conditions its inhabitants in a way they wouldn’t have wanted to condition themselves. Using myself as number-1 example, I believe if I enlist in the Nigerian Army […]

Fornication is illegal in Nigeria – Wikipedia

March 27, 2009

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  see for yourself: click here

LoveNotes: wedding ring thoughts running through my head

March 16, 2009

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Why the wedding ring is worn on the fourth finger? Try it out once!!!!!!!!! Why should the wedding ring be worn on the fourth finger? There is a beautiful and convincing explanation given by the Chinese….. Thumb represents your Parents Second (Index) finger represents your Siblings Middle finger represents your-Self Fourth (Ring) finger represents your […]

careless mommy with four kids receives public beating

February 5, 2009

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A woman with 4-children, 2-boys and 2-girls, on her way somewhere was careless with how she handled the kids, and received a public beating by bystanders who had been watching her all along. The drama was at Onipanu bus-stop. The eldest two, a boy and a girl had wondered away from where their mother stood, […]

how many wives does President Yar’Adua have

February 4, 2009

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I arrived at the title of this post last week Tuesday as I viewed the picture below.  This picture graced the front page of the Nigerian Guardian Newspapers. I had purchased a copy and was glancing through after work. The first question that crossed my mind, which honestly, I don’t have an answer for is: […]

LoveNotes: HTML

February 1, 2009

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Heres something I wish mommy sat me down, put me through, and schooled me in.

Mama se, Mama sa, mama coo sa

December 17, 2008

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    I met her on the walk way Stared as she walked pass She looked back at me side ways and said I can’t help but to ask I said you wanna be startin’ somethin’ You got to be startin’ somethin’ I said you wanna be startin’ somethin’ You got to be startin’ somethin’ […]

the difference between LOVE and JEALOUSY

December 16, 2008

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LOVE     JEALOUSY

mypenmypaper: notes from my dashboard

December 16, 2008

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Check out my new dashboard…which I just saw this morning, phew, where have I been all these days. See pic below: its cool grey, but what caught my attention is/are the posts regarded as Top Posts. I just got to ask myself: are these what people are really looking for on my weblog? The following […]

July to December, the 9-months mathematics

December 1, 2008

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I remember complaining that her wedding gown was outrageous. In fact, if I knew her tailor, I would have reprimanded such for sowing such a flimsy outfit for an educated bride on her wedding day. I remember her smile in front of the church and as she marched in and out, which I felt was […]

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